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Amazing powers of BS-craft?
May. 4th, 2009 11:14 pmSo I've spent the better part of today studying, culling together information from which to fashion a narrative. I am hoping my attempts will lead to an amazing power of BS-craft, wherein I can convince a panel of 3 PhD level social workers that I know enough to answer questions and pass my exam. As of right now, I am not ready. But hopefully I can get ready in the next week.
Oddly enough, I am not feeling the same level of panic that I did around my other exams. Stress, yes. But panic? No. Am I defeatist already? Eerily calm and focused? In denial? Apathetic? Demonstrating herculean feats of hubris? I'm not sure.
Challenging assumptions that limit one's life and that question power relations are at the core of postmodern theory in social work application. I am so good at applying that in the construction of gender, and in LGBT rights discourse. But can I apply that to policy research? Not so much. That is the leap I must make in the next, oh, two days, before I move on to applying Marxist theory to social policy research. All without the pleasure and privilege of having anyone to guide me outside of the texts that I must find on my own. Aaah, the joys of being an autodidact.
This evening my friend nycD popped over after going to a play. We had tea. He brought a friend, who is the only orthodox rabbi in NYC who is an out gay man. We had an interesting conversation about the orthodox community and parental rights for lesbian mothers. We also talked about people creating and demanding their own space within their synagogues as out LGBT people. He seemed more comfortable with being out and gay and observant than nycD. And he seemed fascinated by me, and by MD, and the myriad ways in which (in his view) G-d brings people together. He also thought MD was very pretty when I showed him a few pictures.
As we were talking, I secretly tried to fashion a postmodern response to his concerns for the parents of gay children to form community online and attempts by P-FLAG to create an orthodox Jewish chapter in NYC. It is an interesting exercise to try and explain phenomena and offer a postmodern social work practice perspective to a conversation around a very real social phenomenon/problem. But I couldn't do it. I might yet, as an exercise that will help me with my exam. But it's sad that my socializing has been reduced to this.
I am choosing to grab any opportunity to apply theory right now. Perhaps this was a gift of a scenario for me to grapple with? Well, it was nice to spend a few minutes having tea with an amiable and bright individual at any rate. It was unexpected but not unwelcome.
But I will remain stressed until this whole exam process is over. There's no denying it.
Oddly enough, I am not feeling the same level of panic that I did around my other exams. Stress, yes. But panic? No. Am I defeatist already? Eerily calm and focused? In denial? Apathetic? Demonstrating herculean feats of hubris? I'm not sure.
Challenging assumptions that limit one's life and that question power relations are at the core of postmodern theory in social work application. I am so good at applying that in the construction of gender, and in LGBT rights discourse. But can I apply that to policy research? Not so much. That is the leap I must make in the next, oh, two days, before I move on to applying Marxist theory to social policy research. All without the pleasure and privilege of having anyone to guide me outside of the texts that I must find on my own. Aaah, the joys of being an autodidact.
This evening my friend nycD popped over after going to a play. We had tea. He brought a friend, who is the only orthodox rabbi in NYC who is an out gay man. We had an interesting conversation about the orthodox community and parental rights for lesbian mothers. We also talked about people creating and demanding their own space within their synagogues as out LGBT people. He seemed more comfortable with being out and gay and observant than nycD. And he seemed fascinated by me, and by MD, and the myriad ways in which (in his view) G-d brings people together. He also thought MD was very pretty when I showed him a few pictures.
As we were talking, I secretly tried to fashion a postmodern response to his concerns for the parents of gay children to form community online and attempts by P-FLAG to create an orthodox Jewish chapter in NYC. It is an interesting exercise to try and explain phenomena and offer a postmodern social work practice perspective to a conversation around a very real social phenomenon/problem. But I couldn't do it. I might yet, as an exercise that will help me with my exam. But it's sad that my socializing has been reduced to this.
I am choosing to grab any opportunity to apply theory right now. Perhaps this was a gift of a scenario for me to grapple with? Well, it was nice to spend a few minutes having tea with an amiable and bright individual at any rate. It was unexpected but not unwelcome.
But I will remain stressed until this whole exam process is over. There's no denying it.
